What it’s like being a successful female biz owner with diagnosed ADD + ADHD

Ladies…

It is no easy task, to stay on task. RIGHT!?

I didn’t know how much harder and yet easier things would get after having a kid.

On one hand, your schedule is not your own. You are a slave to your house during nap time and your previous life of just leaving on a whim, disappears.

On the other hand, you learn how to get 1,200 things done in less than that two hour nap time.

I’m actually writing during his nap time right now and I have a list of like 10 tasks I need to finish for my business, but I thrive under pressure and they don’t need to be done for four days.

Let me share with you the task list of a successful biz owner with no team (yet).

  • Creating PowerPoints for Break Free Mastermind training.
  • Writing a book
  • Finishing a product so my graphic designer can start creating the look
  • paying Costco, Amazon and regular credit card
  • Enrolling early birds into the Activate your Gifts Retreat (the planning process hasn’t even begun yet and we’re less than 3 months away)
  • Sending session notes to private clients
  • Creating a 5 day challenge with free guides and an opt in page
  • Sending welcome letters to retreaters
  • Trying to figure out what I can automate
  • Social media for my second Instagram account “In My Sweats” named after my podcast
  • Recording a new podcast

I told my Fearful to Fit Fam that I’d be taking them on the journey with me. I wanted to show more behind the scenes of the unglam life of owning a biz and really doing 20% coaching and 80% biz.

In the last three years I went from $1,000 – $3,000 per month and now I’m averaging over $14,000 per month.

This is why I’m letting you in on the not so pretty. The 12-14 hour work days and why I wouldn’t want to do anything else, but this.

So, what’s it like owning a biz with two learning disabilities?

I use them to fire me up.

Having ADD and ADHD means I can do A LOT at one time. Like a scatter brained mongoose on the loose. She’s crossing her t’s and dotting her i’s but it’s more of a round about way then the rest of them.

I finish everything I start.

That wasn’t the case a few years ago. It’s a muscle I’ve had to grow and it pays off immensely.

I’m also more committed to plans than I ever have been.

Another muscle.

I’m a deep feeler, like so many of us ADD women.

And when I don’t feel my peppiest, I don’t want to be around people.

If I’m already zapped, I don’t want to be more zapped.

BUT if I constantly go with my feelings, I’d never leave the house!

So, I’m pretty good now…***instantly flashed to my toddler not sleeping and me canceling all my plans.***

Here are the best ways I know how to cope with a very active, excited mind:

Write it down. Whatever it is. Write that shit down. An idea? A grocery item? A bill you have to pay?

Say it out loud. Tell someone your idea and see how they respond. Are they like, “OOOooooooooo” or “oh?”

Walk outside or on the treadmill. THIS IS KEY to moving stuck energy around. I do jumping jacks and jump up and down before I give a master class to hype myself up.

Take deep breaths before doing a Facebook Live. I do this to calm my nerves. Some days I don’t want to be seen, I want to hide in my house under the comfiest blanket ever, but I don’t. Wanting vs. doing = two very different things

Turn the music on. When you feel stuck or stagnant – pump that shit up and start a family dance party or even party of one.

I took meds for ADD for four years and it royally screwed me up. I cut out sugar, gluten and dairy a long time ago and it helped immensely. I drink green juices and smoothies for energy and clearing the foggy head. I love basil and herbs and use them to heighten the taste of food – and they are epstein barr killers (I have it) so I use natural herbs to kill the pathogens.

I stay away from caffeine. It makes me panicky and sweaty.

I drink tons of water.

But these things don’t work for everybody. I developed a blueprint for my diagnosis and help other female biz owners do the same with their diagnosis.

Schedule your breakthrough call, so you can stop guessing your protocol. Talk to an expert. Someone who’s been in your shoes and knows how to get you from point A to point B without 15 detours.

Why I named my podcast, “In My Sweats”

 

Too excited to read and want to go listen? Head to iTunes or go here: https://inmysweats.podbean.com/

 

So, you might be wondering why I named my podcast, “In My Sweats.”

 

I worked with my podcast coach on the title and found myself trying to be someone I wasn’t. My initial idea was to name it FIERCE. But it felt too domineering for my style and WAY TOO in your face.

 

Then I wanted to name it, NO SMALL TALK. But felt like that was weird and sad.

 

For a little while I liked, “I CAN’T FAKE LAUGH,” which is true, but what the hell does that show offer? Nothing. I felt like I could hear a needle drop.

 

They were all trying too hard to be clever and I could see right through my own bullshit. When I looked deep within and cleared away all the crap, I imagined myself in my basement working in my sweats.

 

I like people to feel comfortable.

 

I have 5,000+ pairs of sweats (okay, more like 10), but still…

 

I wanted to interview people who didn’t have to get ready before we talk, because ya, I might be interviewing someone, but really we’re just having a conversation about life.

 

This is my first creative leap for literally THE HELL OF IT. There I said it. This podcast’s only intention was to invite people to feel at home while they listen. Maybe nod your head or exclaim, “ME TOO,” while driving. I wanted to talk to Mama’s who didn’t have the picture perfect birth and took the road less traveled. I wanted to talk to real people who share the good, the bad and the wtf.

 

I really want you to listen and see if you can feel at home with us, so if you wouldn’t mind…hit that subscribe button and if you feel it deserves 5 stars, LAY IT ON ME.

 

Make sure you’re in your sweats while listening: https://inmysweats.podbean.com/

19 Months Post C-Section

You guys.

When I hear how a first time Mama is going to deliver her baby at home, I cringe. I know too much. I’ve heard too much from my firefighter husband about babies who are delivered outside of the hospital.

Looking back, I am SO UNBELIEVABLY grateful I had the opportunity to make it to the hospital where I was surrounded by world class nurses and mid – wives and ONE REALLY GREAT DOCTOR! Without this team of trained medical staff, my delivery would’ve been a disaster.

Since having beastmode Bode, I’ve had time to reflect back on what that experience was like and what it’s like to be almost two years removed.

I don’t know if I’ve written about this before because I almost never go back and reread blog posts, but I grieve for that innocent little first time Mama who imagined something completely different than what reality gave her.

I was so scared.

I can go back to those last few hours of the operation in seconds.

My mind is like a steal trap for the memory of that emergency c – section and I want to hold every Mama who has had a traumatic c – section in my arms and never let go.

The physical pain.

Not just the fact that you’ve just given birth and had your entire world turned upside down, but you are recovering from a major abdominal surgery and trying to comprehend what just happened while a baby is screaming at you until you place their little mouth over your overly sensitive nipple.

The pain of breastfeeding.

I will always remember what it feels like because at one point I had cabbage leaves on my nipples to reduce the pain.

That is until my friend told me cabbage leaves were used to reduce milk flow. WTF.

And then going up and down the stairs…

The biggest mistake you can make when recovering from a c-section.

Well the stairs and laughing or crying or sneezing or choking on water and trying to suppress a cough.

OUCH!!!!

Here we are 19 months later and I still get pain when I’ve worked my core too much, but I’m starting to see muscle again.

OH ALMOST FORGOT – the lightning strikes of pain that happen when your tissues are trying to fuse back together – that never gets old. It feels like rods of lightning in your belly that shock you any time of day or night. The pain can be so bad that it wakes you up from a deep sleep.

If it sounds like I’m complaining, it’s because I am.

I’m complaining at the lack of knowledge we have going into a potential c – section every time we give birth or that some mama’s cover up their pain by saying they are fine and love motherhood.

What the fuck is going on?

Am I living in an alternate universe where we have perfect hair and perfect makeup and pretend everything is not going to fall apart if one more cup spills everywhere?

The amount of times I use the word ‘fuck’ in my house…

If the walls could talk.

Just today, when I started the bath for the little guy, I go into my room to get a towel and by the time I’m back (5-7 seconds later) Bode has fallen in the tub, soaked from head to toe, shocked then screaming and all I’m thinking is OH MY GOD!!!!

What if I got a text, got distracted and taken another 5 seconds and what if the water had been higher and he got trapped underneath and drowned?

I think about Bode Miller and his little sweet daughter who drowned in the pool this year. She was the exact same age that Bode now. That shook up parents everywhere because drowning doesn’t discriminate.

IT HAPPENS.

So this is what I’m thinking when I see Bode dripping wet after probably feeling the water temperature and falling in.

The endless worry that they aren’t breathing if they’ve napped too long or that their cough is a little too hard or their face doesn’t look quite right, it doesn’t stop.

Some days I wonder if I’m strong enough for all the worrying.

I know I am.

But I wonder.

And then I start to think about Mama’s with mental illnesses and think about how freaking hard that must be for them!

We put our kids in front of our needs because we have too. They are our responsibility.

There are so many comparisons too.

“I only have one and she has 3! I should stop complaining.”

1 is like 20, I’ve heard 2 is like 30 and then nothing really changes because it’s such a madhouse.

And of course on one side – the hardships, but on the other the light…

Bode is a light. A joy. A smart and intuitive soul. A thinker. An observer. Aggressive. Athletic.

He’s going to get away with so much because of how cute he is – a woman at the grocery store told me my daughter was pretty today, so there’s that…

That’s why we do it despite the other galaxy parenthood soars us into.

We get to see these little humans that we’ve created evolve and grow and emulate and hope that they don’t get all the stuff we don’t like about ourselves.

We’re nutty enough to do it again and again and again because there are so many moments of PURE JOY and HAPPINESS. I’ve smiled more over the last 19 months than any other time in my life. I’m too tired to cry, but I’m sure it’s in there somewhere.